Tuesday, October 12, 2010

.My Son, My Journey {Part 3}.

"Do you believe I can be your everything?"

I can still remember the clear sound of His whisper in my ear.

"Am I really sufficient?"

Somehow, unwittingly, I uncovered the reality that my journey is mostly a reflection on how people have impacted me. So, I am going to continue in that way... until things change or until I run out of people.

With that said, meet Jo. A sweet, gentle woman that God placed in our path. She and her husband are seeking adoption via ET as well. In fact, it was her blog that led to our watching Lucy. The part of her journey that found its way into my story came after we chose to adopt.

Honestly, I thought it would be the most fantastical news anyone would want to hear. I thought that when I told people our plans, they would run up and down the streets. They would say things like "I am so proud of you." or "God is so awesome to have put this on your heart." Instead, our story was kind of... "so, we have been accepted to adopt via Ethiopia!" {cue the crickets.}

That's when Jo spoke the words into my life that I needed to hear. I wish I could say them all to you, but honestly, they are hers not mine. When it all is said and done, of all the things she said... the words I will never forget were: "I am doing this because I love God and I believe HE is in this. I want to be in His will and I want to be like Jesus for this little life." {me too, Jo}

{Part 3, Truth 3} Jim, it is about God, a little life in ET, and your obedience... not anything or anyone else.

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Wednesday, October 06, 2010

.My Son, My Journey {Part 2}.

"Do you believe I can be your everything?"

I can still remember the clear sound of His whisper in my ear.

"Am I really sufficient?"

Public perception {my perception} about adoption is {was} full of lies. If you can't birth your own... If you are wealthy... If your life has a void nothing else can fill... Don't get me started on the lies... Honestly, I wish I could stand at the top of the Holy pile and cast judgment down on all "those guys" that pereptuate these lies, but the truth is, I was one of them... {wince} [Just once I would like to have figured this stuff out before I write about it, but alas, that is not my story]

Jim, meet Lucy. There are a few people who everyone in the adoption world know all about, every once in a while, one of those people make their mark on their "gotcha day." For Lucy, God showered a divine charisma that He is using to fuel revival {at least in me}. Lucy, it is my desire to one day hug you and express to you everything you began in me... with tears in my eyes I write:

{Part 2, Truth 2} It starts with one...

{And for me, it started with a beautiful little girl in ET who forever owns a piece of my heart.}

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Tuesday, October 05, 2010

.My Son, My Journey {Part 1}.

"Do you believe I can be your everything?"

I can still remember the clear sound of His whisper in my ear.

"Am I really sufficient?"

God has been tearing me down for quite some time now. I am only now at the place where I can look backward and begin to see just how pathetic I truly am in light of Him. Honestly, I am a very selfish person. I am extremely prideful, and I have a huge propensity for seeing the grass as greener on the "other side." Most of my life I have spent dreaming about how good it would/could be if only... Never once considering how good it is. I remember in my past ministry, relating to people how content I was, how I was "living my dream", all the while knowing that it was words I should say, not words I wanted to say. Not because I wasn't living my dream, but because I couldn't ever find true contentment.

Now, before I digress too far, let's just leave it at a reality that I have long since worked to attain full control of my world and a death grip on my circumstance.

In walks Gerlie... my family's Compassion child. Thank you Gerlie for opening my eyes to the Truth that I have it sooo good!

It was in reading the realities of Gerlie's circumstance that God began to rub a salve on the eyes of one selfish, prideful, pathetic soul and begin the process of removing the blinders of my life.

{Part 1, Truth 1}
Jim, you lack nothing.

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